Take Credit for Those Beautiful Curls

Last week Curly Film Chick and I had a cute little dinner date, forgot to photograph the dish, but as usual we got into our many talks about our lives, and growing up and hair experiences. Which led me to one of mine... never realizing I had curls.

When I was a child, my mother kept my hair in box braids and single strand twists as an easier way for her to deal with my hair, and whenever I wore my hair out, it was generally in afro puffs. I never knew that I had curly hair, and I dont think any one else did either. Not to mention that once I was able to do my own hair I was obsessed with piking it out... I think it had something to do with watching Marsha on the Brady Bunch and thinking you needed to brush your hair 100 times everyday to have the prettiest hair, lol.

I remember I used to love shampooing my hair in the mirror because I would see it get all wavy and thought that was beautiful, but once i took that pik to my head there were waves no more, so I just attributed it to the shampoo making my hair that way...

When I was in Cosmetology school at the Carsten Aveda Institute, I did my first big chop (click to read the crazy story!) because of a crazy chemical process I did in Brazil  gone wrong. My hair died on my head, and after about 2 months of holding on to dead hair, I chopped it off. I would let my friends wash my hair in school for the scalp massages, using Aveda's Be Curly line, adding the curling products, so again, I attributed my curls to the products. 

Had I knew how to manipulate my curls, I would have taken credit for them a long time ago and I would have already had the natural hair I always wanted. Lesson Learned.

What ever your hair type, take credit for it's beauty and love it for what it is, instead of hating it for what it's not. Take credit for your curls because they're yours, not because you're mixed with whatever. Take credit for your curls because you love them.

When did you first realize your hair's true beauty?

Hair Crush: Thandie Newton

One of the first movies I saw the gorgeous Thandie Newton in was Beloved (a movie that actually freaked me out, but that's a post for another day!) and The British actress transitioned for 2 years so her daughters could see that their hair is nothing to be ashamed of.

  

I read through this interview where she discusses her hair issues growing up, how Chris Rock's Good Hair documentary opened her eyes about how strong the chemicals in relaxers are, and the notion that we have to "tame" our hair. I really liked that she stood by her decision to allow her daughter's hair big and loose so that she doesn't have a complex. If you haven't read the interview already, you really should; Newton brings up a lot of hair issues I think we can all relate to. In the meantime, check out her big, curly hair!

 

Have a hair crush? Submit to us at yais.nyc@gmail.com!

To Transition or to Big Chop?

That is the question! lol

Now that I've been coming up on two years natural, I have been doing so much reflecting on my natural hair journey. I've actually been natural for 2 1/2 years, originally BCing in March of 2010, then BCing again in Oct of 2010. 

Why the second BC so soon? I wanted to have completely virgin hair so I cut off about two to three inches of colored natural hair (bad choice). I loved my virgin hair, but looking back I wish I had transitioned out of the color instead of chopping my little bit of length off. I actually currently have color that I think I may be transitioning out of.

Before I did my original BC, I transitioned from relaxed hair, but only for about 4 months.

What has all of this taught me?

It really just depends on your lifestyle choices and sometimes even more so, your natural hair goals. 

Let's Weigh it out:

Big Chop

Pros: 

• easy wash and go's
• styling in no time
• not having to deal with two different textures
• being able to see your hair grow from nothing to everything!
• seeing your hair at all different lengths

Cons:

• very little style versatility
• growing through awkward stages
• realizing your hair is going to take a while to grow long (if length is your goal)
• can be hard to protective style

Transition

Pros:

• Keeping your length in the meantime while you grow out your natural hair
• Your natural ends will not yet be exposed to damaging elements

Cons:

• Dealing with 2 different textures and the territory that comes with it; breakage and excessive tangling at the demarcation line, thick voluminous roots and flat thin/stringy ends
• Having to either manipulate the relaxed hair to look natural,   or the natural hair to look relaxed
• Having to put heat on your new natural hair constantly if you plan continue regular straightening

Well, If I missed any pros or cons in either area, please let me know as I'd hate to be missing out on anything, and would love to add it to the list. So ladies and gentle dudes, to transition or to BC?

Quick TWA & Up Updo!

I did an updo on a failed braidout this morning in preparation to go to an event this morning. I thought it was really cute when I did it but got over it and put my hair in my trusty two buns before I left the house. Luckily for you all, I snapped a few pics before the style went bye bye, lol

I didn't plan to do this, i just had a few bobby pins by my side, my soft bristle brush and some Murrays Cream beeswax... started by separating out the front section (as you can see I did not part anything), doing a roll going backwards and pinning.
I then french rolled up the back while pinning, and at the top, folded it back towards the french roll and tucking it under, creating another hump. Tighten, pin, loosen to your liking, leave out a few curls if it tickles your fancy, and Voila!

This should work if your hair is at least 5 inches or longer, you may just need to tweak everything a little :) This is also a great protective style because your ends are all tucked away.

 Even great for transitioners to tuck away those straight ends.
Here's a link to another rendition of this same style I did a few months ago on my shorter hair.

 Good luck and have fun styling!

   

(excuse the messy room : )

Would anyone wear this style?!

A Transitioning Story: Influencing My Mom to go Natural

My mother's beloved weave

A little over two years ago I influenced my mother to go natural. She didn't put up much of a fight at the the thought of fuller, longer hair, but definitely was not going for a big chop. I weaved her up for a year straight during the initial part of her transition, but for the rest of it, she either wears buns or straightens her hair. Whenever I can I'll snatch her up and try to give her a curly style with her luxurious curls, like I did the last time I made a little post about my mom, but of course she always reverts back to her die hard buns. lol
One day after washing her hair, she decides its a good idea not to detangle, or condition, throw a hat on her damp hair and walk out the door to run some errands before coming to see me. OY VEY! This lady gets here and the back of her hair is as matted as I dont know what! After about an hour of trying to detangle one small section with loads of oil and HEHH I gave up, and told her to get over it because it was Big choppin' time! (It might sound mean, but  that was a matt to remember and I was OVER it!)

 Because she still wanted to be able to pull her hair back for ponytails and have a bit of length to rock her weaves, we decided that since the front hadn't matted that we wouldn't chop it off as of yet... so I guess you could say she had to get half of a Big Chop.

Since then she hasn't worn any weaves for over a year and has been sticking to her good ol' buns and flatironed hair.

My mom has a super, simple hair regimen that basically consists of washing her hair, blow drying, or air drying in twists, and wearing a bun slicked back with water and JBCO. Sometimes she also braids and/or twists her ponytail before bunning. When she decides to straighten her hair, she generally wears it out and ends up putting it in a loose ponytail so it doesnt get all messy if she's busy and moving around a lot. 

She has told me of a few times when she's wore her hair natural (I still haven't seen her wear her hair out and natural to this day unless I did her hair that day) so she was super excited to show me this shot a friend snapped of her wearing her hair down the other day. 

I know I will be doing her hair again soon because she's due to come see me for a trim soon, and I'll definitely be doing a length check on her also so stay tuned!

 Is your mom also natural? Did you influence her to go natural or did she influence you?!

Anyone have a cool Transitioners Story they'd like to share? We'd love to hear some cool stories from all of you transitioners out there! Send your stories to Yais.nyc@gmail.com

Reader Question: Transitioner Learning how to Style

Sietta (Not Pictured Above) said...

I'm looking to transition from wearing sew-ins to wearing my own natural hair again, but I'm lost about how to go about styling it :( I haven't worn my own hair for more than a week in almost 5 years and I don't have a perm so as you could imagine it is very difficult to work with at this point and I am concerned about styles because of this. Also, my coils are SUPER tight and idk what to do with them at this point because my hair has never been this untrained so I know I have a job ahead of me lol. Do you have any suggestions for styles until I can get my coils to loosen a little?

Hi Sietta, 
Thanks for asking and we're glad to help =)
For starts, I would say it'll be a little hard without a few extra details (Hair length? What look you would like to achieve? What do you mean by trained hair and coil loosening?)but I will give you the best advice possible for anyone in your situation or anyone who needs help learning their new texture and how to care for it.

Part 1 - Moisturize, Detangle & Stretch!!!
As a professional hair stylist, time and time again I've seen women trying to go natural after wearing weaves for quite some time, but feeling discouraged about their "rough, dry, hard" manes. They think they have this horrible texture of hair because it is usually dry and malnourished, and because of this, their hair may also be a lot more shriveled and shrunked up.

Start with a spritzer bottle with water, get some of your favorite slippery conditioner, take your hair in one section at a time, moisturize, detangle from the ends up, and either braid, twist, bun or band the little section to keep the moisture in and your hair from shrinking up again (You can also do this in the shower if it's easier/faster for you). 

Part 2 - Washing
Don't be afraid, moisture and water are your best friends :)
After detangling and moisturizing it should be much easier to deal with your hair now, and if you have a lot of hair you may want to leave it in those sections during your wash. If/when I wash in sections, I will bring a few hair clips in the shower with me so as I wash one section at a time, I can twist and pin it back up so it stays stretched and detangled and I won't need to comb through my hair again....or at least bring a scrunchie to throw it all in a ponytail.

Part 3 - Styling
When it comes to styling natural hair, it's all about knowing the look you're going for, and understanding what your hair will and won't do. Henna and other natural products like coconut milk have been known to cause a little curl loosening, but usually on looser textures. The way we usually go about loosening our curls usually is by way of chemicals or heat damage, as a lot of hairstylists will call burning your curls out "heat training." Know that this is not an accurate method (not a method at all) ladies.

I love the curly look and my hair is curly but shrinks A LOT so I live in twist outs as it lets me have the look of my own curls, minus all the shrinkage. Doing twist-outs, braid-outs, banding, or any other kind of Set that will stretch the hair, should help with your feeling of wanting to loosen your curls. When I want a curlier, froey-er twist out I will do it on wet hair or re-twist an old twist out, and if I'd like my hair to be a little silkier, I'll first rollerset my hair and do my twist out on that. 

Here are some links to help you along your journey:
Tips For Naturals
Creating Textures
Creating a Regimen

I hope this helped, and please, don't ever feel like your options are limited, And Haircare above all else!!!

Momma SP's Natural Hair

My mom came over yesterday for a little moment to chill and I was surpised to see her with her hair in it's natural state. I always thought my mom had some of the most beautiful hair, so of course I got her to go natural too. The last time she had seen her hair all natural she had to be in her early teens... 30 sum' years later, I helped her transition for a year by weaving her hair up, having to chop a little earlier than she inteded because of a matting incident (Lady didn't listen to me, washed her hair, didn't condition or detangle or anything and just threw a hat on. -_- NO.) My mother works a lot and ponytails are easy for her, so since the matting only occured in the back, all of the relaxed ends were cut from the back, but she still has a few relaxed ends at the top/front to be able to pull her hair back into a ponytail.

She came over with a ponytail, that I switched out for a banana clip, picked her curls out, and proceeded to resmooth her curls with a little Eco Styler Olive Oil gel to prolong her style.

Before:

After:
I really love her beautiful, full curly wavy hair, and I can't wait to chop those stringy ends off. My mom has very strong, healthy, full hair and I'm soooooo jealous, but also so proud of her for letting go of the relaxer... it was about damn time. She is in her second year of being natural and nearing APL soon, the longest her has been since she was a teenager... She's always had a full head of shoulder length hair, but I think that's saying something about the creamy crack! lol

 Love you momma... And all that hair!!!

When you started your natural hair journey, who did you take with you?!

When Going Natural Part 2: Expectations For Your Hair

I've mentioned before that although I've been natural my entire life, I never really saw my curls or played in my hair while it was loose. I knew my hair would shrink up when wet but often wondered what would happen if I just wore my hair like that. At first I wasn't sure about my hair. As a Black Woman of Color with a mixed heritage, I wanted my hair to be "either or" - either big bouncy curls or wavy/straight. As we all know, just because you are "mixed" does not mean you will get a certain "look." This in-between I discovered was strange and at the time I couldn't find anyone who could help me manage this "in-between." But now, it's been my quest for the last few years to play with this idea, and while I've hardly been a wash and go type of lady, I like the way my curls look. I know that I have a mixture of spiral curls: some are loose and some are tight and some parts of my hair are more wavy. It's intriguing to learn how to manage the different patterns And if you're discovering your curls for the first time, it may not be what you expected at all.

Some naturals may describe their hair using the Hair Typing System because it shows the kind of curl pattern your hair have; some of us have a mixture of curl patterns. Keep in mind there's no hierarchy as to what kind of hair is "better." I do agree that society seems to like a certain type of curl but that doesn't mean your hair "type" isn't beautiful. Maybe you're not use to your texture just yet, but becoming natural is a journey, one which will help you learn about what it means to have the hair you have.

Are Your Products Actually Moisturizing? Shiny Hair Does Not Necessarily Mean Moisturized Hair

I would say I commend myself for keeping shiny hair although my hair naturally can be anything less than lustrious at times. I have so many people stop me and ask me how I get my hair so shiny, with the famous question "What do you use? Oil Sheen?" Definitely not.
I feel so lucky to have found this community that has helped me to learn the truth about our hair and the products we use in it and why. As a hairstylist, there has been countless times where a girl would come to get her hair done and it would be dry, hard and brittle, but greasy or oily at the same time. Adding layers of grease to already dry hair does nothing but clog the pores, weigh the hair down and make it greasy, and make the hair dirtier faster. Now I'm no scientist so I'm going to break this down in laymens terms...

Moisturizing in 3 Steps:
Part 1 -  Water & Washing your hair ~ When your body feels dehydrated, you drink water, so why not give your hair water when it's thirsty? Water is the first part of moisturizing, so if your hair's feeling dry and brittle , it may need some water. If your regimen is one that is low maintanence with washing, make sure you're still adding water to your hair, i.e. via a spritz bottle before retwisting or rebraiding.

Part 2 - Moisturizing ~ Add a moisturizer of some sort. I like cream moisturizers and leave-in conditioners personally, but I will occasionally use a regular conditioner as a leave in or sometimes just a light oil like coconut or jojoba oil.

Part 3 - Sealing ~ You know that feeling you get when you come out of the shower and you dont put any moisturizer on and you feel like your skin is about to crack... maybe it does ::chapped lips for example:: Moisturizing really seals in the moisture our skin just soaked up from the water in the shower... Same scenario for your hair. Moisturizers will dry out quickly if not sealed in with anything. A few of my favorite sealers would be Jamaican Black Castor oil, Jojoba & Coconut Oils, Shea Butter & Shea Oil, Vitamin E oil, and my latest favorite CHI Deep Brilliance Glisten.

Quick Tips
If you are washing, conditioning, moisturizing and sealing and your hair still feels dry, it's possible your products aren't providing the right amount of moisture for you, or you just may not be applying them correctly or as frequently as needed. Try tweaking your regimen a bit until you find something that works... One thing I used to like to do was read natural hair blogs and watch YouTube videos of people who had hair like mine, doing the same styling, and see what they would use...

*For Transitioners and Newly Transitioned Naturals - Realize that with this new texture involved that your regimen will have to change, as well as your products probably. Don't expect everything you used to use to work for you now. If your old products are still serving you justice, just make sure you adjust to how much more moisture your natural/transitioning hair needs.

* For Naturals - If your natural hair is always feeling dry, there's definitely a huge problem there. Make sure your products contain humectants such as glycerin, propylene glycol, aloe vera, and honey to name a few, which are moisture attracting molecules.

*For the drastically different multi textured hair - Know that with extremely different textures, sometimes we need to not forget to baby our more fragile textures, or add a little more or even a different product to these areas.

I hope this helps someone out there with their dry hair... Feel free to ask any questions :)

When Going Natural Part 1: Are You Ready

One of my most "peculiar" traits is that I do not do things until I am ready.  If I do, the whole ride will be full of anxiety, stress, and will become quite chaotic. It annoys some people in my life but it's really who I am. I've been fully aware of this for as long as I can remember; my own mother notes that when the doctors gave her a due date, I came two weeks later. For the most part, I take my time with anything I am interested in, researching, testing, pondering. Of course there are circumstances where decisions need to be made right then and there are even times where I can be pretty impulsive; but going natural isn't one of those things. There's no pressure, not from this blog or anyone in your life, to transition or "big chop" until you're absolutely ready.

I have a bias to natural hair. I think textured hair in general is amazing and so expressive. Straight hair can't do what our hair can do, but we can get straight hair when we want. Some say it's hard to manage, but if you are used to wearing your hair one kind of way, of course it'll be difficult to manage at first. That being said, if you aren't ready to take the time to learn your hair, you probably shouldn't go natural yet. It doesn't make you any "less" of who ever you are. For me, not relaxing was the best decision because I was doing it for what I feel were the wrong reasons - after being told all my life that I have too much hair, that I have "good hair" that would look so much better straightened, that I'd rep my heritage more if my hair was different, that I wouldn't be taken seriously with braids and twists I thought relaxing would solve all my problems. It was not a desire for a new style, it was a desire to change myself for something better because I had low self-esteem, and had I not seen it in my then eleven year-old sister I would have relaxed (and probably would be transitioning right now).

If you are transitioning right now or considering embracing your hair honestly ask yourself: What are your reasons?

Relaxers Vs. Naturals IV: Stop the Hate; Remember the Truth

These days there's so much talk out there about who's truly natural, based on who's been natural their whole life, who has color treated hair, who doesn't use all organic/natural products, and/or whatever other bogus rules people seem to keep coming up with. Who died and made them the Natural Hair Gods who get to decide who is a natural hair puritan and is allowed into the curly gates anyway? Lol
As someone who's been through everything when it comes to hair, both physical and emotional, I've learned that there are lessons far more valuable behind being natural than shunning someone for straightening their hair occasionally or having color in their hair.

After natural hair blogging for a little over a year now, I see that a lot of the same discriminatory issues I see in the black community are occurring in the natural hair community; People discriminating against different hair types, those discriminating against other's choices with their hair. Deciding to return to being natural, and especially being introduced to the online natural hair community, really taught me the real reason behind why I was going natural this time around and the reason why I at this point felt that most other ethnic women should embrace their natural hair too: It's all about acceptance; Learning to accept yourself for who you really are, and accepting others for who they really are ...or who they really aren't ...or for whoever they choose to be. We were and still are discriminated against the most by other races, being the most different, so it really hurts me to see when we continue to break each other and ourselves down when we should be supporting each other and all the differences around us that make us the beautiful and most exotic ethnic people that we are. 

If a woman is natural and decides to straighten her hair for a week, what makes her any less natural? She is indeed natural, and obviously secure enough with herself to love wearing her natural hair and can be outgoing enough to try different hairstyles, straight ones included.

If a woman is natural and decides to color her hair, are her braid outs and twist outs now inadequate because she is color treated? When you're working with frizz and humidity or shrinkage or dryness, is she not still going through the same journey as you just because her hair is color treated? 

If a woman decides to return to or try using a relaxer, obviously she is no longer natural, but even so should we discriminate against her? What are her reasons behind relaxing, and why not learn something from her experience that you can pass on instead of joining the ignorance in bigotry?

If a woman is natural and wants to try or return to relaxer for a different hairstyle for a different period of time, its okay. Regardless of whatever chemical alterations she does to her hair, it will still continue to grow from her roots as glorious as our creator(s) intended and that, she will never be able to fight. There is nothing wrong with wanting to switch it up every once in a while and for the most part, she will more than likely go back to natural sooner than later. Learn from her reasons for relaxing her hair.

Now for example, if you took a moment to understand where the 4zzz (for hairtypers) is coming from, you would understand that a texturizer may be a better alternative for her lifestyle to keeping her hair healthier and from breaking and tangling since the curls are tight. Are you there in the morning to help her moisturize and style her hair? Now as we would all say there are other alternatives and why turn to chemicals, but if that's her choice, that's her choice.

Just for a hairstyle change... Cool, catch you back on the natural side!

Because she hates her natural hair... You should help her to learn that she should learn to appreciate her natural hair for what it is and to accept and love her true self, regardless of how she decides to wear her hair.  

We are no better than those who discriminate against US when we discriminate against each other.

The truth is we need to stop the hatred that goes on among us.

Let people be who they want to be and continue to be you for the right reasons. 

If natural is who you are, then let that natural show love and compassion for fellow people and understand that their journey may be different, but we all cross paths for a reason. Pass on the good word of being natural, self love and love and respect for all things and living beings, instead of passing on negativity and fueling the issues we're still struggling to overcome.

We should continue to promote health for the hair, the body and soul.

Going natural this last time around to me meant learning an even deeper love for myself and a deeper appreciation for the differences and similarities in others, and promoting that all people should do the same.
Don't be a Natural Hair Hitler.

The Beginning:

Relaxers Vs. Naturals III

Relaxers Vs. Naturals II

Relaxers Vs. Naturals

Tips on Curbing Product-Junky-ism

A lot of folks who are "going natural" or just discovering how to care properly care for their hair succumb to being a product junky, where you buy a ton of products to try out. Some might be looking for their "holy grail"--the product that will solve all your curly hair problems. Trying products is obviously a good way to figure out what your hair likes in combination with various techniques. But how can we try products without going flat-broke, overcrowding our cabinets (and perhaps irritating those you live with)? As a former product junky--who was in college at the time I started figuring my hair out--here are some things to keep in mind.

Shopping List: Keep in mind that all these shampoos you are buying don't get used at the same time! You only need one at a time. Might I suggest this list when buying products: 1 shampoo/cleanser, 2 conditioners (detangle, leave-in, deep conditioner), 2 stylers (mousse, gel, "butter") and an oil. I'm just suggesting the maximum of what you could buy, get less if you need to. And this gives you lee-way to play with the combinations of these products (i.e. Conditioner A isn't a good mix with styler Y but great with styler X). Which brings me to my next point...

Use the Products Properly: When using a product, I think it's crucial to use it as directed to achieve the best results as you most likely will be able to judge it better. Also, try the product more then once to get a feel for it. I know that products like Kinky Curly Curling Custard (KCCC) can be difficult to apply because of how it reacts with certain products. It may keep you occupied from buying another product *wink*

Don't Jump On Bandwagons: or rather, be selective as to what advice to follow. Do not continue to use a product that isn't working for your hair just because your "natural hair guru" says it's the best thing ever. Don't follow methods that don't work for you because a natural says that's how it's SUPPOSED to be. Different naturals have different hair and you may or may not get the exact same results. I find it true that you should probably look to those who have a similar "hair type" you have, but you may be like me where you have only come across one other natural who has similar hair to yours (which in my case is a natural at the LITK blog, and who happens to now be free-form locking their hair). Sometimes you can follow the techniques of others who don't have your type of hair but adjust it to your needs.

Learn About ingredients: I've read somewhere that the first five ingredients in a product are used in the highest quantity. So if you like coconut oil, and a product claims to be "fortified" or whatever with it and it's way down there on the ingredient's list, it's probably not worth it. Especially if the product is expensive. It might be best to keep it moving.

Access What Your Hair Needs: Dealing with dryness? Need a good cleanser? Want to do a roller-set or twist out? Buy products that address the issue at hand! If you want a deep conditioner, then search for one and try not to be side-tracked into getting a gel. Trust, it helps it the long run. Focusing on a certain aspect of your hair will keep you pre-occupied.

As a former product junkie myself, I know all too well about the temptations. At this point, I no longer buy products on impulse and it takes me a long time to actually give it a try (see SheaMoisture products). I only shop when I know I need something and if I want to experiment with a style. Hope this was somewhat helpful!

Natural does not = Afro (Creating Texture)

This post is for all of the relaxed ladies thinking of going natural, and all of those transitioners who are still a little reluctant about going completely natural...
Time and time again i have recommended friends to go natural, and i have gotten a few to start transitioning for the long haul, some in weaves, and 2 clients who have transitioned from relaxed to texturized.


The ladies who are thinking of going completely natural always seem to have the same question, or what seems to be more of a fear.
"Do i have to wear an Afro? I don't want to wear an afro."
The answer is NO... And what's so bad about an Afro anyway?
It's unfortunate that so many women are uneducated about their natural hair and think that there is no versatility in it, especially for the more tightly curled textures. There are so many different styles and results you can have when you learn how to style your natural hair, and i have learned thats it's all about creating the texture you want.

Straight Hair: People relax to permanently create a straight texture. Natural women can straighten their hair by various methods, usually combined. You can flatiron, maxiglide, press/hot comb, roller set, silk wrap and/or blowdry to create a sleek, smooth, straight finish. If you try straightening your hair and you have a lot of damage and split ends, it will show and probably not get as straight as possible, or you might have straight hair and 'afro ends.' Your ends may not be used to being straight so try your best to smooth your ends by silkwrapping, wrapping, pincurling, finger smoothing, whatever you can, and if that doesn't work, your ends may be split and in need of a trim. Remember to ALWAYS use heat protector when using heat so as to avoid heat damage.
You should also make sure to do your best to preserve your style by wrapping/ pincurling at night so as to avoid needing to add heat to the hair again. 
*A smoothing and heat protecting serum is a great way to keep away frizz and add a bit of moisture and shine.

Wavy/Curly Hair: To create wavy and/or curly textures, women rely on sets. What do you mean by "sets?"
A set refers to creating a texture and setting it to last. You can set your hair by using a curling iron, doing a rollerset, flexirod set, perm rod set, straw set, bantu knot/ china bump set, twist set, braid set, or setting your own curl using certain products/gels to help preserve your own natural curl pattern (example: Using a product like Kinky Curly Curling Custard or Ecostyler gel).


Sets have memory and can last for a few days depending on how you care for them, resetting by re-twisting a twist-out or putting rollers back in the hair to sleep can help to prolong your set. Wet/damp setting usually lasts the longest/ holds the most memory. If you want a long lasting style (usually set to last for a week), set the hair wet and let dry. Your final result will be up to you so remember to set your hair in the direction you want your hair to lay (example: If you are doing a twist out and want curly bangs, make sure you do the front twists coming to the front so when you untwist them, they're already hanging forward). Make sure you also use the right products to help you achieve your desired look, like using holding and frizz reducing products, or only moisturizing products and/or light hold if you like a more 'free' look.


Remeber that while setting, you are creating the texture you want, so for bigger waves/ curls, do larger twists/braids/knots or use bigger rollers/rods and vice versa for tighter waves/curls.
 Some people would rather dry set, probably because they want to stretch the hair first to show more length or have a sleeker/ less textured look. Braid outs, twist outs, roller and rod sets can be done on blowdryed/flatironed/air dryed hair as well.
Take your time and experiement with your hair and you will learn that your options and results can be endless. With any hair type, remember that everyone has bad hair days so if something doesn't come out perfect, try again or try a different approach.

Afros: Yes, an afro is a texture some choose to create, as not all people have hair that stands up as an afro would. An afro is basically a bunch of separated curls that stand out from the head and usually defy gravity. 
Some people may tease their hair to create an afro texture, set their hair on small rollers/ rods or in small braids or twists and then comb/pic them out to separate the curls/texture and shape the afro. 
Some people want a fully rounded/picked out afro while others like textured afros, created with either their own afro/texture or a set texture.
Either way, know that our options are NOT limited!
Now remember, it's always going to be harder to have and keep the texture that is the most opposite from your own hair texture, and remember that as women with textured hair we are not the only ones who go through these issues. Just as it can be difficult and time consuming for straight Asian hair to be curled and stay curly, the same goes for our curly hair and trying to straighten and keep it straight.
Once you go natural, it's always easier when you embrace your natural texture and natural styling, as opposed to always wanting to straighten, as it will of course be the most time consuming and damaging. 
If your texture is not ideal to you or you just want to try a new look, learn how to create the texture that you like and don't forget that your hair's health should come first and foremost. 


Have fun experimenting with creating textures!